The end of the day

 “The sacrifice that honors me is a thankful heart. Obey me, and I, your God, will show my power to save.” Psalm 50:23 (CEV)

I don’t know what it is about the end of the day. My guards are down. I’m tired. I just complain about whatever is in my heart. My husband, who is a Godly man, encourages me to be thankful. He says God wants to change me and I need to accept God’s ways. I go to sleep and I start over the next morning. 

I grabbed a cup of coffee and opened one of my old Bibles. I felt like God was speaking directly to me. He said: 

“I am God Most High! The only sacrifice I want is for you to be thankful and to keep your word. Pray to me in time of trouble. I will rescue you, and you will honor me. The sacrifice that honors me is a thankful heart. Obey me, and I, your God, will show my power to save.” Psalm 50:14, 15, 23 (CEV)

I was in awe. God saw the content of my heart. He was not pleased. God also knew that I was offering the wrong sacrifice to Him. In my mind, spending a day not complaining was good enough. He knew that my heart was filled with bitterness.

He said, “The only sacrifice I want is for you to be thankful and to keep your word.” 

My word a couple of months ago was that I would fast on Wednesdays from sun up to sundown. The first Wednesday went well. The following Wednesday, I ended the fast earlier because I “needed energy.” 

Liar. I told God I would do something and then modified the plan. God said, “keep your word.” So I repented. The following Wednesday, with God’s help, I kept my word. 

During these 40 days, as I read the Bible and pray, God has been very clear about what He expects from me. He wants obedience. He wants me to be thankful. Not verbally but from the depths of my heart. 

If I make a promise, God wants me to keep it. How much more clear does He have to be than this: “The sacrifice that honors me is a thankful heart. Obey me....”

I want to have a thankful heart. I can’t have one if the only thing I focus on is my behavior. My behavior dictates that I do not complain for 40 days. There’s nothing wrong with that unless my heart is full of unrepented sin.

Friend, God is not interested in your behavior. He is interested in your heart. I want you to think about the content of your heart. Is there sin still residing there? Do you have bitterness hanging out and causing you to feel yucky? Do you hold anger back (no matter how tamed) when you think about complaining? God can fix all of that. How so?

Repent. Go to God with a humble attitude and admit you can’t change on your own. Submit to His word. The answers are all there. Listen to God’s voice. He might require you to go on a fast. He might require you to apologize to someone. Listen to His voice. Obey. Don’t be discouraged about what it takes to walk in obedience. Just do it. 

The end of my days is changing. I’m still tired but that old bitterness is gone, thanks to God’s mercy and forgiveness. 

This 40-day journey hasn’t been pretty. It has required brokenness and humility. I realize that this is the way of holiness. We submit our will to God so His will can be lived out in and through us. 

Prayer: Lord, I admit I haven’t been thankful from my heart. Forgive me, I pray. I want to hear your voice. What do you require of me so I can truly change? I commit to obey you, no matter what you require. Your ways are better than mine. You are good and you want good for me. In Jesus’ name, Amen.